January 6, 2015 (original post here)
Since we’re a couple of days into the New Year, I was wondering how your New Year’s resolution(s) is/are coming along. Have you been able to start your new habits? Have you been able to stick to your new diet regime or work out plan? Sometimes it can be difficult to motivate yourself into starting something new and sometimes it’s difficult to stay motivated and keep going.
I want to tell you guys a quick story. I went to high school with a girl (I’m actually taking the characteristics of a lot of people I knew and putting it into one person), right now we’ll call her Nancy. When I first met Nancy, she seemed pretty normal. Quite at first, but then she started to open up more and became comfortable with her new group of friends. She had a boyfriend and everything seemed to be going pretty good for her.
During her junior year of high school, her and her boyfriend had a horrible breakup. She was also on bad terms with her parents. I befriended Nancy, and I was already friends with her ex-boyfriend before I met her, so it got awkward sometimes when she would talk to me or when I was talking to her ex. However Nancy was a decent person and she looked like someone that could always use a friend. Fast forward a couple of years…
I started to become extremely irritated with Nancy. It seemed like all she ever did was complain about life; her tweets always talked about how she didn’t have any friends to hang out with or how lonely she was. Her Facebook status was always about how life isn’t fair and that she was always getting the worst that life had to offer. I got sick of it and just decided to stop talking to her.
I’m sure we all know someone like Nancy. For me, Nancy is a culmination of 3-4 people that I know. Now you may be wondering, why in the world are you talking about this when you started off this blog post talking about New Year’s resolutions? The reason I’m bringing Nancy up is a simple one. If you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired, then get up and do something about it.
I always get frustrated when people try to tell me just how horrible their lives are. I understand that life can be pretty shitty (sorry for the harsh language, but I think we can all agree, it’s a pretty accurate description), but what frustrates me is that the very people who are complaining about how bad life is, how unfair it is, how lonely it is, and how boring it is do absolutely nothing to change their lives.
When my sister got diagnosed with leukemia and while I was still going to church regularly, I learned that life is unfair to everybody, but the reason why some people may seem to have it better than others is because they’re proactive with their lives. Instead of sitting down and complaining about how lonely it is, they text people to see if they’re free to hang out. Instead of complaining about nobody loving them, they volunteer their time to give others joy and in return, they feel valued and worthy. Going back to my Nancy story, I once asked Nancy, after she had posted something about not having anyone to hang out with, if she had texted anyone if they would want to hang out. She said she didn’t; honestly it was after that moment i was done with her. She didn’t do anything to pull herself out of the situation. She was hoping that somehow someone would think that she wants to hang out.
The funny thing is that we have all pulled a Nancy. We have been that person waiting for the universe to magically make everything happen for us. I know that I’ve been that person. I’ve waited for opportunities to magically fall into my lap. When you multiply any number by 0 all you get is 0; no matter how many friends you have or how many people you know, if you don’t do anything with them or try to do anything with them, it’s the same as having no friends. The same reasoning can be used when it comes to new doors opening for you. You could be the smartest and the most charismatic person around, but if you don’t go out and apply for jobs, internships, or school, then what’s the point? You’ll have all of these great things but no way to gain new opportunities.
Let’s go back to the New Year resolution(s). The resolutions you made were derived from things you want to change. Sometimes they’re based off of personal goals and sometimes they’re based off of what people have said about you. When it comes down to it, we can all set ourselves goals, but the most difficult part is actually going out and being active on those goals. If you really want to achieve your goals, you must continue to be proactive. It’s easy to talk about what you want to do or what you hope to do, but now I want you to go out and do it. Don’t wait for the universe to help you drop those 5 pounds, go out and do it for yourself. Don’t wait for the universe to bring you people to hang out with, start talking to people you see everyday; invest in them and build a connection with them. Go out and take life by the horns. Go out and know that you also have a say in how your life will go, and that you choose to keep going forward, you choose to continue to choose.
It’s your life. If you want to be like Nancy and spend most of your time complaining, then that’s fine. However, if you’re sick and tired of being sick and tired, then be proactive and just go out and do it.